In fact, I take it a step further. I tend to actually start writing blog posts or essays or poetry... in my head. As I lay there. And I'm talking like, full-out, well-crafted writings (At least in my opinion - but what do I know, I'm half-conscious during these moments. We're all Einstein when it's irrelevant). But I don't get up and write them down, of course. I'm trying to sleep here, after all. So I draft. It feels incredibly productive in the moment.
Naturally, I wake up completely and totally frustrated with myself for not only losing zeal for what I thought up in my quasi-dreams, but impossibly, for not having actually written them down to document with some sort of magical brain-to-computer usb connection.
But I think what I'm actually frustrated with is my laziness. My general reluctance to act in my oh-so-very-important waking hours.
When we're in the thick of our days, doing the things we are obligated to do or feel like we "need" to do, it can be incredibly hard to also actively pursue things that would benefit us or magnify the Lord. These would perhaps take time, a stop in our motion - and sometimes, we just don't want to make time for that. We allow the currents, the momentum of our everyday lives have us whiz on by with nary a thought for the still, small voice of The Holy Spirit urging us to take a moment and listen. To give in to what He is telling us to do or pursue in His honor.
What society has whittled down to the concept of a "guilty conscience", I believe is really just a Spirit-tugging.
Why do we make sure to go to the gym, but never follow-through with the mental note to read through the Holy Week gospel narratives side-by-side like we wanted to? Like we planned on doing?
Why, when our impulse is to rest, do we calculate all of the reasons why it is that we mustn't and thus tire ourselves out needlessly?
Why do we wait until we are laying wide awake in bed to realize we could have loved someone better that day, been more patient, or listened more carefully and thoughtfully?
Why do we so easily let our Lord get away from us?
I'm a fast walker. Oftentimes, it's because I enjoy it. I'm a small human by nature, so I get enjoyment out of darting in between folks on the street in a quick and rapid "catch-me-if-you-can!" sort of way. Yes, I am ridiculous.
But in my moments of fast walking, every once in a while I'll come to the realization that I'm rushing for absolutely, 100% no reason whatsoever. And it's hilarious and bizarre all at the same time. Here I am, nearly running to literally go somewhere and sit. Or even if I am going somewhere important, there are USUALLY no bears chasing me and the Olympic speed-walking is probably unnecessary.
Once the alarm clock sounds, we are a fast-paced people. Smell the roses? What ros...?
See? Couldn't even finish my sentence let alone smell a flower. I was too busy power-walking to the grocery store or scrolling rapidly through my Facebook.
It can be so terrifyingly easy to forget to take the time out to appreciate all that the Lord gives. And He does give. He gives and gives and then gives some more. Because He is gracious. It is in His nature to give good gifts to His children, both large and small, direct, and subtle. (Matthew 7:11)
He gives because He loves. So tremendously does He love. Have we ever really stopped to think about the implications of what it would mean to not spare your only Son for an entire people? To give Him over to excruciating physical pain as well as mental, emotional, and spiritual abuse and humiliation, all the while separating yourself from Him in order to accomplish your will?
No, chances are we haven't. Because it's really really hard to. Because it's not exactly a position we find ourselves in. But that doesn't mean we can't appreciate the magnitude of what this means in our lives.
God gave you life. Every moment that you walk about on this earth, you either encounter or potentially encounter things that will cause you to stumble into sin. Some sins grab a hold of you and refuse to let go, choking out your very vitality - while others mount up gradually in little dribs and drabs. Regardless of the sin itself, all sin separates us from God, who knows no sin. He is only Good.
Because of our mess-ups, we are not able to draw near to the One who is all Good; naturally, our ways offend Him. What do we do when we offend someone? We try to make it right. We give of ourselves in some way, whether it be our words or our time, in the attempt of righting our wrongs.
But what words or what deed could ever possibly be good enough to redeem ourselves with the Creator of the Universe - who is all that is Love, all that is Good, and all that is Right, and therefore created these things? Nothing. There has to be a death to something.
But are we going to give up our lives? No. He doesn't want that. Not physically, anyway. He loves us, and wants us to live and have our being in Him (Acts 17:28), and to live life abundantly (John 10:10).
But in order to receive that life, there needed to be some death. But who? Who could take our place FOR us? Could another human intercede for our sin against God?
No. But Jesus could. Because by the incredible power of God, Jesus, who is God-eternal, came to this earth as a man. And He was both fully God and fully man, in one of the most powerful divine mysteries there ever was.
This usually trips us up, but listen. What good would a mere human's death do if it weren't our own? If I hit my brother on the arm and my dad apologizes for me, I still did the bad thing. That doesn't change. And even if I did apologize, my natural tendency is that I am going to keep on sinning deliberately and even unintentionally. There would never be enough I could do to be holy in His sight.
If there is going to be an effective intercessor, there needs to be the added level of Deity. Christ died on our behalf, bearing all of the justified wrath of God on His human body so that the Lord's anger could be satisfied (Isaiah 53:11), and His Deity enabled Him to be raised from the dead. In this miraculous act of history, death and sin were not only defeated, but conquered. And because not even the grave could keep our Lord and our Ultimate Sacrifice, neither will it be able to keep or enslave us.
Does that mean we stop sinning? No. We still live in a fallen world and we are still imperfect, and the time has not yet come for Satan and his demons to be cast into hell forever. But what it does mean is that when we do sin and confess that sin to the Father, "He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:9). No longer are we slaves to sin. If we believe in what Christ has done for us and surrender to Him as our Lord and Savior, we have freedom.
While Jesus took our place in His physical death and bodily resurrection, we also die to sin spiritually and are made new creations in Christ. (2 Corinthians 5:17) When we accept what Jesus has done on our behalf, we then spiritually identify with His death and resurrection as well. Of course, the Bible puts it in a way more clear and inspired than I ever could:
-Romans 6:8-11 (Emphasis mine)
And we do need new life in Him, friends. So very desperately. Take a good honest look at any given day in your life and note the gunk that accumulates in your own heart and mind. If you're being truthful, this should be enough to convince you. But if it isn't, I'd ask you also to consider the horrors that exist in the world we live in. Child abuse. Senseless murder. Suicide. War. Genocide. How can we look at these things and not see that evil exists and that we desperately, desperately need a Savior to restore the world and the individuals inhabiting it?
It's certainly a work-in-progress for me, but now when I'm tempted to ignore the Holy Spirit's voice, I try to listen. I seek out what His word is lovingly telling me. And I ask Him to HELP me listen, because I know I'm often too selfish to do it on my own.
I encourage us all to hear the voice of Jesus this Easter weekend, and for the rest of our precious lives. He is telling us such wonderful things through the Holy Spirit!
“But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come. He will glorify Me, for He will take of Mine and will disclose it to you. All things that the Father has are Mine; therefore I said that He takes of Mine and will disclose it to you."
- John 16:13-15
He died so you don't have to toil and fight against sin each and every day. He came to give you freedom. He came to make you His own.
Be still. Appreciate. Take note. Give thanks. Quiet yourself before His throne. Take a seat at the foot of the cross and consider all that He has done for you, and how very much He loves you.
Friends, let's rest in His palm today. Let's receive unlimited grace in His strong and protective arms.
Let's not wait until the day is done and we retire to our beds to encounter the Lord; let's stop and smell His roses right now.
God Bless You All.
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